TRENTON-- So, it's a Thursday night and I'm on Facebook running through the news feed that never seems to stop and I stumble across a relationship blog cipher happening at the Trenton Social in just 30 minutes. I hop in the car and head right over because I recognize that despite feeling like I have a firm grasp of what it is to be in a quality relationship, I understand that sometimes feeling like you know something doesn't necessarily mean you really do.
Indeed, relationships at times can be hard work. I don't have to tell you this, we hear it all the time at the barber shop or at the hair salon, around the water cooler at work, at the church, in school, in the news, you name it, the issues surrounding relationships are all around us. But being an African American male, the issues in Black Relationships trouble me in particular.
New York Daily News Columnist Ralph Richard Banks reported in 2011 that roughly 7 in 10 black children are born to unmarried partners. Conditions like this almost always lead to children being raised by one parent, which believe you me, can be a struggle and a strain on families. So, I said all that to say that the more we talk about these relationship issues, the more we can begin to address to them and not deny their existence.
Indeed, that's a big reason I went to the Relationship Blog Cipher hosted by Neisha Kelly, a relationship blogger. I wanted to hear some thoughts and feedback on what's happening in our relationships. I wanted to receive some insight on some of the dysfunction plaguing our partnerships. And after going, I can definitely say my expectations were met. During the Cipher, we talked about a whole host of issues and topics. The subject matter ranged anywhere from whether it was necessary to have a 'checklist' of things you want from a relationship to whether relationships should be liberating or restrictive.
The discussion was on the one hand refreshing because it truly felt like a sigh of relief to get some things out in the open and clear the air about relationship concerns yet at the same time our exchange was somewhat challenging to the extent it got me to give careful thought to my ways or habits in relationships. The Relationship Blog Cipher is a conversation that needs to be continued and from speaking to the show's host Neisha Kelly, there is more yet to come...